Simon Petrie's "Guy Walks Into a Bar ... (Theme and Variations)" (flash fiction, humor, free)

A collection of 4 very tiny, unlabeled, humorous stories (more like jokes) - all beginning with "Guy walks into a bar" & something happens. I liked first & the last.

Fact sheet.

First published: Antipodean SF, #127 (December 2008).
Rating: B.
Download full text.
Related: Stories of Simon Petrie.

Simon Petrie's "The Elder" (flash fiction, science fiction, free)

This reads like essays I was sometimes asked to write in secondary school - world from the point of view of something non-human. Something could be a currency coin, a bicycle, a pen, ...

This is the story of semi-sentient tree. A little one learning about its own destiny, shaped by humans, from an elder tree.

There is an attempt at humor near end, but I didn't find that in good taste.

Fact sheet.

First published: AntipodeanSF, #109 (June/July 2007).
Rating: B
Download full text.

END.

* Simon Petrie's "Stranger Than..." (flash fiction, science fiction, humor)

Interesting rejection letter of an unsolicited submission to "Aldebaran Stories" - an sf magazine in some alien world. Story described a society similar to current humans, & it was rejected as so utterly implausible to be suitable even for this magazine specializing in the fantastic.

Fact sheet.

First published: AntipodeanSF magazine, #118 (March/April 2008).
Rating: B
Download full text.

Note: Why is this post so short?

* Simon Petrie's "Field Dynamics" (flash fiction, science fiction, humor)

An alien scoutship is exploring earth for possible conquest. Only, the potential conquerers are so tiny - a human takes the ship for a kids toy! Some bafflement, & he finds it's too much trouble, & carelessly crushes it under his tractor tires! But aliens have not given up. Next scout ship is on its way...

Fact sheet.

First published: AntipodeanSF magazine, #117 (February/March 2008).
Rating: A
Download full text.

Note: Why is this post so short?

* Simon Petrie's "Fomalhaut 451" (short story, science fiction)

While investigating the cause of an abandoned & dead deep space human habitat, Zia discover the horrific answer. Fomalhaut is name of the star in whose system the habitat is. While the title is obviously a take on Bradbury's famous story, I haven't read the original - so cannot connect the two.

Fact sheet.

First published: AntipodeanSF, #116 (January/February 2008).
Rating: A
Download full text.

Note: Why is this post so short?

AntipodeanSF magazine, #118 (March/April 2008): Annotated table of contents & review

10 tiny stories. See opening remarks of #116 for any non-obvious conventions in the listing below. Full issue #118 is available here.

Story list (best first).

1. Shaun A Saunders' "Golden Age" (B); download; science fiction: A human starship was forced to perform a certain maneuver somewhere far off to get out of a tight situation, & ended up in the vicinity of earth as a side effect! We will slowly learn they are from earth in an alternate universe; this earth is rather unfamiliar! There is also a reference near end to "space rangers" - I suppose from Heinlein's book, but I haven't read that book.
2. Simon Petrie's "Stranger Than..." (B); download; science fiction, humor: Interesting rejection letter of an unsolicited submission to "Aldebaran Stories" - an sf magazine in some alien world. Story described a society similar to current humans, & it was rejected as so utterly implausible to be suitable even for this magazine specializing in the fantastic.
3. Brendan D Carson's "Steel" (B); download; science fiction: A scientist has turned an experimental subject into a superman, & then into a vegetable on death bed. But thanks to an inadvertent but kind action of a nurse in hospital, his disease is gone & now he is superman again!
4. Paul Ryan's "Island" (B); download; non-genre: An agent, on a visit with a buyer to a now-uninhibitedly land of his mostly extinct tribe, is himself murdered by the buyer who can presumably now simply have the island without payment!
5. David McVeigh's "The Gravity Bomb" (B); download; science fiction: Inventor of an antigravity device has his family kidnapped by authorities to force him to hand it over. He capitulates. Military has tested a gravity bomb based on it - only it's out of control. Even after it's turned off, some sort of antigravity wave keeps moving all over earth - bring destruction in its wake. Inventor has an inhibitor - to kill the effect - but wants to watch destruction for a while, as revenge because his family was threatened.
   
   Reminded me of a story by Arthur Clarke - "The Road to the Sea". Some kind of a probability-changing propulsion system for a starship - tinkers with quantum probability of where a particle will be found in the universe - has gone out of control, & the wave is headed towards earth - threatening all life on it.
6. Jan Napier's "Oriental Bizarre" (B); download; non-genre: A woman's hopes of exotic adventures are dashed by mundane.
7. Jane Brown's "Where Am I" (B); download; science fiction: A woman, in deep freeze after her clinical death - preserved with the hope of some-day resurrection, is becoming aware of her surroundings - possibly because stasis machinery has broken down.
8. Chris Broadribb's "The Whale" (C); download: Cannot quite figure this out. A woman observing a whale from a rocky lookout has some mysterious experiences involving whale & a man - as if someone is attempting to contact her & than changed his mind.
9. Daniel S Santos' "The Man, the Faun, and the Washing Machine" (C); download; fantasy: A boy has taken laundry to a "laundry-mat" (shop where you can rent a washing machine & drier), & finds a magical world with wizards & fauns inside one of the machines!
10. Peter van der Male's "Return From Avalon" (C); download; religion: Sounds like a rip off some Christian tale; to me it didn't mean anything. You might make better sense of it if these names mean anything to you: Gael, Gwyr, "one who now called himself Lothario, and the brothers, Lob and Iddig", & Merlin. Tone & ending is humorous.

Related: All AntiSF stories.

[1/3] AntipodeanSF magazine, #117 (February/March 2008): Annotated table of contents & review

20 tiny stories, 8 good. See opening remarks of #116 for any non-obvious conventions in the listing below. Full issue #117 is available here.

Story list (best first).

I was forced to split this post into 3 parts due to Blogger label length constraints. This is part 1 (stories ranked #1 to #8, all A-rated); go to part 2 (stories #9 to #13, all B-rated), or part 3 (stories #14 to #20, all C-rated).

1. Greg Wickenhofer & Rick Wickenhofer's "Orbiter's Reward" (A); download; self-ref; science fiction: Beware of "cute" & very useful robots; they can be very dangerous! Added to my best of the year 2008 list.
2. Brendan D Carson's "Spawnotrim!!!" (A); download; self-ref; science fiction, humor: "Spawnotrim" is the magical weight loss drug on the market, imported from the alien world "Beta VIIa". The capsules contain seeds of alien life that live inside you by slowly eating your innards! And they manipulate your nervous system to make you feel happy, & ready to welcome your new alien masters - while you quickly move towards death! Story has the feel of late night TV advertising in India - the kind selling cheap appliances over phone, with ads that last hours at a stretch on major channels (must be very profitable business)!
3. Bren MacDibble's "Taku Kinu" (A); download; self-ref; science fiction, humor: Tale of a stupid law enforcement officer.
   
4. Simon Petrie's "Field Dynamics" (A); download; self-ref; science fiction, humor: An alien scoutship is exploring earth for possible conquest. Only, the potential conquerers are so tiny - a human takes the ship for a kids toy! Some bafflement, & he finds it's too much trouble, & carelessly crushes it under his tractor tires! But aliens have not given up. Next scout ship is on its way...
5. David Conyers' "Redemption Slot Machine" (A); download; self-ref; science fiction: An AI psychiatrist cum memory surgeon, in return for $10, gives a man reason to live & find fulfillment rather than commit suicide.
6. Matthew Nicholls' "Turing Test" (A); download; self-ref; science fiction: An android indistinguishable from humans except in one test.
7. David McVeigh's "Man In Grey" (A); download; self-ref; non-genre: This is a political story about a current issue. An alien "Executioner" is meting out justice on earth. In the story, we see part of the hearing & then execution of the President of a rich country.

   Accusations include:

   1. "You ordered complex maneuvers to evade international law in order to transport political prisoners to places of torture".
   2. "Even now, you prosecute a war in a backward country on a very ... transparent pretext!"
   3. "your coercion of other, more moderate nations to your way of thinking."

   Accused's defense that didn't cut with the judge/Executioner includes:

   1. "We are a sovereign power protecting our security against terrorism."
   2. "We're world leaders. We brought peace. We raised backward nations to prosperity. We're strong. We protect the good nations... No one can survive without our democracy. The terrorists want to hurt our economy."
8. Charles Richard Laing's "The First Heartbreak" (A); download; self-ref; science fiction: An unconventional love story - from the time when sea animals were just getting out to land.

Continued to part 2 & part 3 for remaining stories...

Related: All stories from AntipodeanSF magazine.

Note: Links labeled "self-ref" are for my own administrative use - to let me link to a specific story from elsewhere when needed.

AntipodeanSF magazine, issue 116 (January-February 2008): Annotated table of contents & review

Hmm... 10 stories, 2 qualify for my best of the year list, 3 more I will recommend without hesitation. Looks like the biggest haul I've yet had of good stories from a single magazine issue.

I also like the USP of this magazine - very tiny stories. No great time wasted even if you don't like something.

Here is the list of stories in the magazine, in order I liked them (best first). My rating is in brackets (ABC: A = worth your time, C = don't bother).

1. Peter MacGregor's "Ally's Torment" (A); download; fantasy: Gods from the perspective of Aleesha. I could have been more specific with description, but that would spoil the fantastic story ending. Added to my best of the year 2008 picks.
2. Glenn Davies's "In His Image" (A); download; fantasy: A young man builds & uses a time machine to go meet his dead grandfather, & discovers he doesn't want to return. Beautiful ending, though not original. Added to my best of the year 2008 picks.
3. Derek Smith's "Mobile Phones Are Addictive" (A); download; sci-fi, humor: A take on Wikipedia & nutty claims about cell phones.
4. Simon Petrie's "Fomalhaut 451" (A); download; sci-fi: While investigating the cause of an abandoned & dead deep space human habitat, Zia discover the horrific answer. Fomalhaut is name of the star in whose system the habitat is. While the title is obviously a take on Bradbury's famous story, I haven't read the original - so cannot connect the two.
5. David Such's "Immigration" (A); download; non-genre: To meet their terrorist identification quota targets, corrupt visa officials are looking for scapegoats among innocent citizens.
6. Alan Dawson's "The Wall" (B); download; non-genre, humor: Mobs are so unthinking - they cry out for manipulative leaders! Reminded me of a very lovely low-budget Hindi movie from 1970s - I think director was I S Johar but I cannot recall the title & neither Google nor IMDB are able to help. It was a parody of Indira Gandhi's government of mid 70s; a walled city called "Jan Gan Man Pradesh" ends up electing a funny ruler who does things like in this story.
7. Michael Schaper's "A Paper Man" (B); download; fantasy: A woman finally makes some money after the death of her unsuccessful man, using an idea that cames from the way his end came!
8. Ashley Arnold's "Gernsback's Monkeys" (B); download; humor: Genetically engineered monkey slaves of Mr Gernsback wish freedom.
9. Shaun A Saunders's "ZAN" (C); download; non-genre: A victim's narration of their torture - with a humorous ending to make it appear an apolitical story.
10. Ben Payne's "Risk Assessment" (C); download; non-genre: Four independent very tiny stories about life & death situations - where luck determines if someone lives or dies.

Related: All stories from AntipodeanSF magazine.